Meet TSK, it is dark but we still recognise one another. It has been a long time since I saw him last, so I try to great him kindly, - I try to give him a hug but he walks past me ignoring me. I ask a few people who I meet later why he might have ignored me, they say he was probably just in a rush or was busy, but I feel he still maybe doesn't like me.
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I am playing with two snakes. They are my pets. I try to show off to my friends by getting them psyched up with anger and attempting to get them to fight one another for entertainment, but it goes wrong and instead of fighting each other, one of them bites me, right between the knuckles of my 3rd and 4th fingers on my left hand. I feel the mild poison enter my body with a sharp pain. I quickly brush off the snake off my hand and it seems to shrink and shapeshift into a scorpion and scuttle off under a chair. "Will you be ok?" One of my friends asks, "yeah ill be fine, these snakes are not really poisonous." It feels just a bit more painful than a bees sting.
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I am in a supermarket bit of the country. It is not nice. I meet a lady who I think is J from the course but its not, and embarrassingly I have already given her a hug. She tells me she is further behind , I wonder how a stranger could know this. I do however, meet J from the course a little further along the road. We sit down and have a chat. Its really nice. I feel her warm energy and friendliness and it brings a real cheer to me.
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I am with M in an attic room. Its his attic room with all his computers. I have been telling him about the life drawing classes I have been going to, and he is keen to have a go. We are keen to try and draw some nice large ladies as its a bit less conventional than the more slim figure, we want to show how this is beautiful too by drawing it. He knows someone who wants to model for us as she doesn't think she is beautiful and has lost all confidence in her body. She has developed a phobia of her own body. We agree to draw her, and she
starts to get herself ready. We see the folds of her skin hang down as she begins to remove her clothing. We have our drawing equipment ready. She removes the final items of her clothing with her back to us, and then turns round theatrically displaying the front of her body, and now we realise why she is so ashamed of her body. She has a strange blue/greenish skin condition which looks like a fungus growing all over the front of her body. It has seriously damaged the skin, and her breasts have become all flaked and cracked, and are barely recognizable any more. M is no longer sure he wants to do this drawing, he packs up, but I am determined to keep going.
This really annoys the woman as she wanted us to be horrified and to turn away in disgust, so justifying her mental image and hatred she has of her body. She comes right up close to me, and stands in front of my face.
"so you think this is beautiful do you!?" She says angrily. I notice that I have developed the same condition, starting on the back of my hand and spreading up my arm.
"Look" I say, "I have got it too! Its not that strange".
"You must have caught it off M" she says, "I have never met you before and it is very rare."
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I am in M's attic again. We are clearing it out. We look out of the window into the park. There are lots of people gathering. A bunch of people come up the stairs to tell us, they are going to do a naked dance in the winter rain, as a charity fund-raiser. They ask weather we want to join in. M is not interested but I am. But I dither about, and run out of time.
The reporter and film crew are stood at the top of these flight of stairs, and commenting. The dancers are all hemmed into one tight square of grass in the park, like animals with electric fencing, so they are forced to dance in close proximity.
Me and M get to tidying the attic. It is going to be sold, so the landlord says. There is pigeon poo everywhere. The pigeons have been getting in here for years and since I have not been here for years it has accumulated over all this stuff. I have a big effort getting this block of stone out of the attic. It requires a lot of thinking before
hand.
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I am at this dance gathering. I meet a guy german guy who feels like he has been wasting his life. He says his life is 2 years behind time - that for the past 2 years he has been really lazy and not really doing any work.
I feel the same. I ask him how old he is. 29. Same as me. He asks me if I am married. I tell him no. He's married, and he is envious of my position. He says its great that I'm not married, because its easier to get stuff done. He wishes he was too as it would feel like he had more time. I am envious of his marriage for the companion side of things but I can see his point.
Most of the dancers have left now, and I have missed the dancing. I go to watch a few of the ones who have carried on to the end. They dance beautifully.
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