Message from the Spirits

I'm with N. He is merged and is giving me a message from one of his
spiritual guides,

"You have no respect for the nakedness of the body.  You only see one
form. When I walked in and was naked before you I saw your mind, I
read the smile which you hid from your lips, as if you were about to
snigger under your breath a laugh at those who look differently to
you, at those who's bodies are shapes unfamiliar or undesirable to
you. I see you. Clearly and fully. You do not see me, you see what you
want to see and nothing more."

Now I'm with S.

"You need to wake up and take this more seriously. You pay so little
respect to the spirits.  You've been studying this for 7 years for
god's sake! You hide from your self" He says.

"Seven years?" I say rather sheepishly.

"Yes, it was in 2006 was it not that you did your first journey? Come
on and see what good omens there are for you at this time. The timing
is right, it just needs your dedication and commitment. Step out of
your navel gazing and pissing around. You've not got much time and
you'll only get left behind ".

I am stood holding a bone in my hand, turning it this way and that and
exploring its shape in my hand while reflecting his words. He right, I
realise that yes, it was 7 years ago I made my first shamanic journey
with leo rutherford, a slightly different school of thought but along
similar lines. I know in my heart that I have been not really taking
things seriously, not committing, partly due to a sense of failure, a
lack of confidence, and mostly because deep down I have a little
miserable part of myself that is stubborn and refuses to change and
won't take advice from anyone, weather the advice be good or bad.

"I want to hear you say to the spirits that you will commit to this." s says.

I speak out, but my voice is weak.

The bone in my hand now suggests to me that it wants to become a tool,
a cutting devise. I find a spinning abrasive disc and sharpen one end
of it. It will become part of a costume and a ritual tool.

I feel the spirits are strongly with me, deep down, but I have not
made any serious commitments to them. I know I have not been taking
things seriously, as if it were all a game. Its not about not having a
sense of humour, that's important too, but its about saying what you
mean, and meaning what you say. Its about a working partnership with
the spirits which will only be there if you honour  the spirits and
commit to your actions with dedication, discipline, and a sincerest
concern for the welfare of all people and living beings on the planet.

My bone is sharp now.

"Come on. You need to be getting your costume ready. You don't have much time."
S says.

I see everyone else is wearing these elaborate costumes ready for the
big event. All I have is my bone.

"Right stephen, its your time. Dance. "

I step into the room, no time left for costume preparations. Its an
empty room but the spirits and ancestors are all watching me. I have
the bone in my hand. What am I going to do?

I start spinning around in circles and I want to spin on my head like
break dancers do, but I will probably fall over and look like an idiot
in front of all present. So I decide to not try. I feel a little
awkward. What am I meant to do? Just dance?

Yes.

So I carry on.