I'm in a place full of bustle; lots and lots of people travelling from place to place.
I meet lots of old school friends,
I see Lindsey, and I fall in love with her again; this time I express my feelings to her, even though I think that she will probably think I'm crazy... Its been so long and we have drifted apart so far...
I touch her and tell her I really like her, and she gets where I'm coming from, and is touched by this. Although we both know that it wouldn't work out in the long run, she seems to forget, and me, and for the moment we both enjoy being back in one another's company. We hug and sit locked into one another, up a tree away from all the others. In these moments we share what we never got a chance to do all those years ago. To properly connect and enjoy one another. She shows me lots of things about how things have changed; the school, her friends, and herself. Some other friends come close to us, and so we move out of the tree, across the tops of movable walls.
-----
I'm now on my own, and I'm travelling through a university, surrounded by loads of people. People are heading in all sorts of directions, and I'm heading to this building. I pass some people playing cricket on the way, and join in for a brief while. Inside the entrance hall of the university is my old head teacher, he has become the head of the university, and he has a new bright flashing sign behind him. I can't remember what it says on the sign, but I go through the entrance under the sign and up some stairs. On the stairs I meet a red haired lady; Francis Mcnamara. She is being pursued by a red haired man, and she is not trying that hard to get away; its a game clearly, of flirtation. I see now that Fran is with another girl, Francis Goodall, and the red haired man turns out to be James Clegg. He needs to be with the two fran's. It keeps him sane.
I also find out I'm carrying a rake. I give it to James and say to Francis, " if you really want to be caught we can use this!" And she opens a washing machine and a siren goes off when the door opens. For some reason, I want my rake to make the same sound as this each time I use it...
I next meet Conor. He's with Alys. We make plans to make some music together.
Monday, 12 July 2010
sheffield dream
I'm learning to drive!
I'm going round a roundabout, and i get distracted and do some really bad indicating, but luckily I get away with it.
I'm heading to a market and cultural day in the city center. I wander around, looking at the city street art, and I see some great works, and hear some really cool music. There are food stalls on the street and shops have opened up there fronts and are out on the street. The weather is fine blue skies.
Street performances are happening all over the place, and I see lots of very beautiful women walking around. One of them has a hauntingly beautiful voice, and as she walks past me singing, I catch her eye.
I come to a stall which this young eastern European chap is running, - its a stall which is a game, for kids or whoever. It involves rolling model cars and trains down a sloping track which leads through a tunnel and of a ramp at the other end. The cars are old and battered so it doesn't matter what happens to them. I'm rolling a few cars down and I see Richard Claire is there too, also rolling cars down. I say to him "I had a model car just like this one when I was a kid". I'm lining it up so that it can role down all the way without getting caught on the tunnel.
He doesn't talk to me, but I can see that he wants to say something.
---
I'm now with Richard on the allotment at hanging water, though it looks all different, though I expected to see a difference, - a new lady has been helping Simon, and her name is Edwina.
Richard is talking about how well the allotment looks, - its funny because I think it looks a bit of a mess and could do with a good water. I tell him that I went to see Tolly and he seemed to be impressed. He points to the vine and shows me how under the vine there is still plenty of moisture in the ground, and I see that the ground is still moist and, evidently for how the vine is growing, its clearly not short of water. He says that whoever is doing the allotment must have an artistic sense from the way the elements have been arranged; the pots, the type of salads growing, it all looks like quite a creative endeavour. I have not met Edwina yet but I am impressed with her efforts.
Richard mentions an organisation in conversation that he feels suspicious of, "oh no, here we go all again", I think... I say "soon the next thing they will try will be to make compost illegal. It will be build on some claim that its dangerous and contains pathogens and harmful bacteria."
Richard imagines people out to get him, because he feels that he is the compost guru, and he becomes all defensive.
"There's no way they will ever be able to do that, I'm too powerful now. The movement has grown too big," he says
I warn him of their arguments, " anaerobic composting.. Smelly... Unpleasant..."
"Yes, you do need to be careful with your composting" he replies, knowing full well what I'm on about, and he proceeds to talk about the first steps, the ABC of composting to me, while I water some plants.
I'm pleased we are back in the old dialogue, and that he's his old usual self. We are on track, and its going to be a great harvest.
I'm going round a roundabout, and i get distracted and do some really bad indicating, but luckily I get away with it.
I'm heading to a market and cultural day in the city center. I wander around, looking at the city street art, and I see some great works, and hear some really cool music. There are food stalls on the street and shops have opened up there fronts and are out on the street. The weather is fine blue skies.
Street performances are happening all over the place, and I see lots of very beautiful women walking around. One of them has a hauntingly beautiful voice, and as she walks past me singing, I catch her eye.
I come to a stall which this young eastern European chap is running, - its a stall which is a game, for kids or whoever. It involves rolling model cars and trains down a sloping track which leads through a tunnel and of a ramp at the other end. The cars are old and battered so it doesn't matter what happens to them. I'm rolling a few cars down and I see Richard Claire is there too, also rolling cars down. I say to him "I had a model car just like this one when I was a kid". I'm lining it up so that it can role down all the way without getting caught on the tunnel.
He doesn't talk to me, but I can see that he wants to say something.
---
I'm now with Richard on the allotment at hanging water, though it looks all different, though I expected to see a difference, - a new lady has been helping Simon, and her name is Edwina.
Richard is talking about how well the allotment looks, - its funny because I think it looks a bit of a mess and could do with a good water. I tell him that I went to see Tolly and he seemed to be impressed. He points to the vine and shows me how under the vine there is still plenty of moisture in the ground, and I see that the ground is still moist and, evidently for how the vine is growing, its clearly not short of water. He says that whoever is doing the allotment must have an artistic sense from the way the elements have been arranged; the pots, the type of salads growing, it all looks like quite a creative endeavour. I have not met Edwina yet but I am impressed with her efforts.
Richard mentions an organisation in conversation that he feels suspicious of, "oh no, here we go all again", I think... I say "soon the next thing they will try will be to make compost illegal. It will be build on some claim that its dangerous and contains pathogens and harmful bacteria."
Richard imagines people out to get him, because he feels that he is the compost guru, and he becomes all defensive.
"There's no way they will ever be able to do that, I'm too powerful now. The movement has grown too big," he says
I warn him of their arguments, " anaerobic composting.. Smelly... Unpleasant..."
"Yes, you do need to be careful with your composting" he replies, knowing full well what I'm on about, and he proceeds to talk about the first steps, the ABC of composting to me, while I water some plants.
I'm pleased we are back in the old dialogue, and that he's his old usual self. We are on track, and its going to be a great harvest.
meat
I am walkıng back from town wıth adrıano. We are headıng back to hıs house. Its autumn and the streets are beautıful wıth fallen leaves. We meet Adrıanos sıster on the way, and she talks to us about all sorts of thıngs, but mostly about boyfrıends.
----
I was ın a hall of some sort, and my brother and and hıs old frıend mıcheal was wıth hım.
We were playıng a game whıch was lıke aır tennıs, - we had to hover ın the aır whıle holdıng thıs lazer beam up to the other person, to bounce back to us. If we managed ıt for a long tıme we learnt specıal powers. It was not a competıtıve game, but there were people on the ground who would jump up and grab on, or try to ınterfear, as a way of challengıng us, and makıng us drop. Some of joes frıends were the ones on the ground, and they were all women, and my frıend hıllary was there too, tryıng to pull me down. The value of havıng the people on the ground was that ıt would be really easy and so borıng ıf there was no one tryıng to pull you back down. The further we got on wıth the game the more chalengıng ıt became and now people were pılıng on top of me, and ı stıll had to learn how to float ın the aır. Durıng the game, we realısed that we had forgotten somethıng really ımportant outsıde, and so stopped playıng and went outsıde, to sort out thıs really ımportant thıng. A bıg gatherıng of people were asssemblıng for the really ımportant thıng, and we knew we had to be there too, to wıtness and take part ın thıs really ımportant thıng.
----
I am ın church and ı am playıng organ agaın, but thıs tıme the organ ıs dıfferent. It has more gadgets than ever before, so many cool specıal effects, and ı am tryıng them all out. Mass ıs just about to start, and ı see father tolan gıvıng me a funny look whıch seems to say "ı dont lıke those specıal effects." I get the feelıng lıke ım not aprıcıated here, and so ı get up to leave, wanderıng quıetly and carefully to the back.
-----
I am at a famıly gatherıng and theır are round tables put out ın the garden, under gazebos, wıth flower pattern table cloths. I am sat on a table wıth mostly older members of the famıly; aunts and uncles and grandfather.
There ıs a great varıety of food avaılable, soups, breads, salads, vegetables, meats, cheeses, fruıts. Everythıng you could ever want or ask for.
Most of us are enjoyıng a great varıety of food, but my uncles sat next to me are pılıng up meat on theır plate to hıgh heaven and nothıng but meat. Its as ıf ıts a meat eatıng competıtıon, and they want to see who can eat the most. The meat ıs ın many dıfferent forms, frıed, boıls, sausage, shapped ınto thıngs that dont look lıke meat, but ıts all stıll meat. I put a bıg bıt of meat on my plate and start eatıng ıt to see what all the obsessıon ıs about, but then on eattıng the meat ı fınd ıt bland and flavourless. There eyes are fılled wıth a hunger and thırst for flesh. It worrys me, and ı no longer want to eat thr meat.
----
I am now wıth my frıends agaın, and we are ın the most amazıng place, a place whıch ıs lıke the ultımate theme park. It has everythıng you could ever want. The maın stadıum area, usually full of seats slopıng down tertaces to the playıng fıeld has been changed around so that we can watch a specıal cırcus act, ın fact the greatest cırcus act ever performed. The seats have pulled back ınto the walls, so steep now, that ıts as ıf you are sat on top of the person ın front of you. And the fıeld has been removed to leave a great chasm, at the bottom of whıch, god knows what lurcs.
The performance begıns, and a man dressed ın a costume not dıssımılar to a super man costume but more devıl lıke, wıth horns, walks out along the rope, holdıng a pole to help hım balence. If he falls we feel that wıll be the end of hım.
Now at one end of the stadıum hıs accomplıs ın thıs dangerous act, brıngs out a cannon, and poınts ıt straıght at hım. She loads the cannon wıth these lıttle people, who are able to wrap themselves ınto balls, and she fıres one at hım, whıch only just mısses hım, because he makes the rope sway. She ıs tryıng to knock hım off! Surely he has no chance of gettıng to the other sıde, we thınk. She loads up another lıttle person ınto the cannon to fıre at hım...
Im at the Super Mutant nıght whıch ıs beıng held ın a great hall. The nıght has not started yet, and people are busy gettıng thıngs ready for the nıght. I see the food table, and am surprısed to see that the whole table ıs meat! They have formed the meat ınto great and wonderous shapes, that look so appealıng! Conor and alys look at me, ın my amazed state! "It was what we had, and ıt needed usıng" saıd conor, who ıs usually a strıct vegetarıan... The most unusual thıng they had done wıth the meat was that they had managed to form ıt ınto the exact shape and form of whıte slıced bread - the really cheep stuff you get ın supermarkets, but thıs tıme, ıt was a hundred tımes bıgger. Each slıce was the sıze of a small coffee table top... I pıck one up, and feel that the only thıng ı can do wıth ıt ıs play games wıth ıt.
----
I am surfıng ın the sea and the sun ıs shınıng and the waves are splashıng all around....
----
I was ın a hall of some sort, and my brother and and hıs old frıend mıcheal was wıth hım.
We were playıng a game whıch was lıke aır tennıs, - we had to hover ın the aır whıle holdıng thıs lazer beam up to the other person, to bounce back to us. If we managed ıt for a long tıme we learnt specıal powers. It was not a competıtıve game, but there were people on the ground who would jump up and grab on, or try to ınterfear, as a way of challengıng us, and makıng us drop. Some of joes frıends were the ones on the ground, and they were all women, and my frıend hıllary was there too, tryıng to pull me down. The value of havıng the people on the ground was that ıt would be really easy and so borıng ıf there was no one tryıng to pull you back down. The further we got on wıth the game the more chalengıng ıt became and now people were pılıng on top of me, and ı stıll had to learn how to float ın the aır. Durıng the game, we realısed that we had forgotten somethıng really ımportant outsıde, and so stopped playıng and went outsıde, to sort out thıs really ımportant thıng. A bıg gatherıng of people were asssemblıng for the really ımportant thıng, and we knew we had to be there too, to wıtness and take part ın thıs really ımportant thıng.
----
I am ın church and ı am playıng organ agaın, but thıs tıme the organ ıs dıfferent. It has more gadgets than ever before, so many cool specıal effects, and ı am tryıng them all out. Mass ıs just about to start, and ı see father tolan gıvıng me a funny look whıch seems to say "ı dont lıke those specıal effects." I get the feelıng lıke ım not aprıcıated here, and so ı get up to leave, wanderıng quıetly and carefully to the back.
-----
I am at a famıly gatherıng and theır are round tables put out ın the garden, under gazebos, wıth flower pattern table cloths. I am sat on a table wıth mostly older members of the famıly; aunts and uncles and grandfather.
There ıs a great varıety of food avaılable, soups, breads, salads, vegetables, meats, cheeses, fruıts. Everythıng you could ever want or ask for.
Most of us are enjoyıng a great varıety of food, but my uncles sat next to me are pılıng up meat on theır plate to hıgh heaven and nothıng but meat. Its as ıf ıts a meat eatıng competıtıon, and they want to see who can eat the most. The meat ıs ın many dıfferent forms, frıed, boıls, sausage, shapped ınto thıngs that dont look lıke meat, but ıts all stıll meat. I put a bıg bıt of meat on my plate and start eatıng ıt to see what all the obsessıon ıs about, but then on eattıng the meat ı fınd ıt bland and flavourless. There eyes are fılled wıth a hunger and thırst for flesh. It worrys me, and ı no longer want to eat thr meat.
----
I am now wıth my frıends agaın, and we are ın the most amazıng place, a place whıch ıs lıke the ultımate theme park. It has everythıng you could ever want. The maın stadıum area, usually full of seats slopıng down tertaces to the playıng fıeld has been changed around so that we can watch a specıal cırcus act, ın fact the greatest cırcus act ever performed. The seats have pulled back ınto the walls, so steep now, that ıts as ıf you are sat on top of the person ın front of you. And the fıeld has been removed to leave a great chasm, at the bottom of whıch, god knows what lurcs.
The performance begıns, and a man dressed ın a costume not dıssımılar to a super man costume but more devıl lıke, wıth horns, walks out along the rope, holdıng a pole to help hım balence. If he falls we feel that wıll be the end of hım.
Now at one end of the stadıum hıs accomplıs ın thıs dangerous act, brıngs out a cannon, and poınts ıt straıght at hım. She loads the cannon wıth these lıttle people, who are able to wrap themselves ınto balls, and she fıres one at hım, whıch only just mısses hım, because he makes the rope sway. She ıs tryıng to knock hım off! Surely he has no chance of gettıng to the other sıde, we thınk. She loads up another lıttle person ınto the cannon to fıre at hım...
Im at the Super Mutant nıght whıch ıs beıng held ın a great hall. The nıght has not started yet, and people are busy gettıng thıngs ready for the nıght. I see the food table, and am surprısed to see that the whole table ıs meat! They have formed the meat ınto great and wonderous shapes, that look so appealıng! Conor and alys look at me, ın my amazed state! "It was what we had, and ıt needed usıng" saıd conor, who ıs usually a strıct vegetarıan... The most unusual thıng they had done wıth the meat was that they had managed to form ıt ınto the exact shape and form of whıte slıced bread - the really cheep stuff you get ın supermarkets, but thıs tıme, ıt was a hundred tımes bıgger. Each slıce was the sıze of a small coffee table top... I pıck one up, and feel that the only thıng ı can do wıth ıt ıs play games wıth ıt.
----
I am surfıng ın the sea and the sun ıs shınıng and the waves are splashıng all around....
the food blessing
I am wandering through Endcliffe park, and get caught up with ninjas from a school, where they are being taught by this Ninja Master.
I get taken in, I have no choice, and I have to learn the skill of Ninja to survive.
I meet the ninja master who takes me on as another pupil in his school.
We have to learn skills like floating in the air and breaking down walls with single punches.
The Master Ninja is also a dark sorcerer, and all the ninja pupils need to get away, but we can get away that simply. He has too much power and knows how to keep us there. But if we don't learn a way to get away we will all get taken under his power and loose our individuality. So, as difficult as it is, we must get away.
Jon, Rosa's friend, is one of the trainees in the ninja school. He has special powers and helps me to plan my escape from the Ninja school. Also, John the allotmenter in Brighton, who is the gardener for the Ninja school, also helps me make a plan. I chat with them and they know what to do...
Somehow or other we have escaped, but the Ninja Master has found out and is on the chase.....
We are running to get a train journey, and there are moving platforms which we have to hop between. We have to run so as to not miss our train, and we nearly get the wrong one; we aren't going back to Sheffield, we need the Cardiff one! We just get there in time, despite the elevators nearly crushing us.
Once on the train, we are all under disguises. We mustn't let anyone know who we are - escapees from the evil tyrant. If even the slightest rumor gets out, we will be tracked down and found out! A train ticket inspector looks at my ticket and gets suspicious. He wants to see our bags, and I say we left them at the other end of the train. Owen and I run to the back end of the train and in the process I loose my shoes, and I want to go back to get them but its too late; now we have changed to a different train, and we are safe again.
On this train is a big restaurant and they are making dishes which represent there past. As well as giving the dish a symbol of ones past, they are also making the dish represent ones pain. The dish is a healing remedy to over come ones pain and ones past.
My friend Andy Forbes is one of the cooks. He is waiting for me at the back of the kitchen of the restaurant to finish of this very special dish. He has been filling it with power and creativity but I need to come along to complete the ritual. I turn up and very rapidly deep fry some sugared candy and throw it on. It makes these swirly patterns that solidify very quickly, and now the spell is complete, and our prayers have been externalised. It is ready for its journey into our body to heal our pain, and past.
I get taken in, I have no choice, and I have to learn the skill of Ninja to survive.
I meet the ninja master who takes me on as another pupil in his school.
We have to learn skills like floating in the air and breaking down walls with single punches.
The Master Ninja is also a dark sorcerer, and all the ninja pupils need to get away, but we can get away that simply. He has too much power and knows how to keep us there. But if we don't learn a way to get away we will all get taken under his power and loose our individuality. So, as difficult as it is, we must get away.
Jon, Rosa's friend, is one of the trainees in the ninja school. He has special powers and helps me to plan my escape from the Ninja school. Also, John the allotmenter in Brighton, who is the gardener for the Ninja school, also helps me make a plan. I chat with them and they know what to do...
Somehow or other we have escaped, but the Ninja Master has found out and is on the chase.....
We are running to get a train journey, and there are moving platforms which we have to hop between. We have to run so as to not miss our train, and we nearly get the wrong one; we aren't going back to Sheffield, we need the Cardiff one! We just get there in time, despite the elevators nearly crushing us.
Once on the train, we are all under disguises. We mustn't let anyone know who we are - escapees from the evil tyrant. If even the slightest rumor gets out, we will be tracked down and found out! A train ticket inspector looks at my ticket and gets suspicious. He wants to see our bags, and I say we left them at the other end of the train. Owen and I run to the back end of the train and in the process I loose my shoes, and I want to go back to get them but its too late; now we have changed to a different train, and we are safe again.
On this train is a big restaurant and they are making dishes which represent there past. As well as giving the dish a symbol of ones past, they are also making the dish represent ones pain. The dish is a healing remedy to over come ones pain and ones past.
My friend Andy Forbes is one of the cooks. He is waiting for me at the back of the kitchen of the restaurant to finish of this very special dish. He has been filling it with power and creativity but I need to come along to complete the ritual. I turn up and very rapidly deep fry some sugared candy and throw it on. It makes these swirly patterns that solidify very quickly, and now the spell is complete, and our prayers have been externalised. It is ready for its journey into our body to heal our pain, and past.
tea dream
I'm in a field with my brother Joe and he is showing me his latest art piece. It involves a lot of theatrical stuff.
I carelessly leave my camera in the field, and now I'm worried if someone will come over to take it.
---
Simon is making a vague word link between the word tease, and the word disease.
He suggesting to me that teas (the drink) are poisonous or that teas cause disease, because the words are similar in sound. This is so random and vague i think to myself. Its not even just random, its blatantly not real, and I get annoyed. I feel its wrong to make such silly assumptions and superstitions. but maybe he is talking in reference to the over doing it of tea in western world.
Its Simon's birthday, but he is not planning a party. He explains that he only has a few needs and doesn't need lots of people around. Simon tells Alick that he appreciates his friendship, and that Alick satisfies his need for a friend. I am intrigued at his independence, how few people he needs to feel happy and content. I get the feeling that Simon is coming from a very different thinking place to me.
I think about the Microcosm macrocosm idea, to justify, or disprove what he's saying about tea. I then think about how animals eat off what humans waste.
Imagine a world without humans, i say to myself.... It seems quite hard....
---
I'm now with my brother Simon, and we are playing a game. This game involves trying to fire out a bullet as far as you can by creating pressure; only the ones with pressure fire out. There is this rack of willies, and we have to load them up in time to create the right pressure. soon the time will run out....it is hilarious!
"Are you crazy Stephen?", my auntie Vivian asks,
"Yes, I've always been crazy." I reply.
---
I'm on bus, traveling through Pitsmoor in Sheffield. I see lots of suspicious looking people out of the bus window, and it makes me mistrust the people around me.
I get off the bus and enter a door at street level, and go up a stair case to enter new roots. Its a different way to get into the shop, and it surprises me. We have to go through a restaurant to enter into the kitchen area. I meet JJ in the kitchen, and I show him the secret passage.
I see Becka and Claire having a conversation in the restaurant. The conversation is about lovers. Becka says she likes Claire, but Claire is more reserved.
I carelessly leave my camera in the field, and now I'm worried if someone will come over to take it.
---
Simon is making a vague word link between the word tease, and the word disease.
He suggesting to me that teas (the drink) are poisonous or that teas cause disease, because the words are similar in sound. This is so random and vague i think to myself. Its not even just random, its blatantly not real, and I get annoyed. I feel its wrong to make such silly assumptions and superstitions. but maybe he is talking in reference to the over doing it of tea in western world.
Its Simon's birthday, but he is not planning a party. He explains that he only has a few needs and doesn't need lots of people around. Simon tells Alick that he appreciates his friendship, and that Alick satisfies his need for a friend. I am intrigued at his independence, how few people he needs to feel happy and content. I get the feeling that Simon is coming from a very different thinking place to me.
I think about the Microcosm macrocosm idea, to justify, or disprove what he's saying about tea. I then think about how animals eat off what humans waste.
Imagine a world without humans, i say to myself.... It seems quite hard....
---
I'm now with my brother Simon, and we are playing a game. This game involves trying to fire out a bullet as far as you can by creating pressure; only the ones with pressure fire out. There is this rack of willies, and we have to load them up in time to create the right pressure. soon the time will run out....it is hilarious!
"Are you crazy Stephen?", my auntie Vivian asks,
"Yes, I've always been crazy." I reply.
---
I'm on bus, traveling through Pitsmoor in Sheffield. I see lots of suspicious looking people out of the bus window, and it makes me mistrust the people around me.
I get off the bus and enter a door at street level, and go up a stair case to enter new roots. Its a different way to get into the shop, and it surprises me. We have to go through a restaurant to enter into the kitchen area. I meet JJ in the kitchen, and I show him the secret passage.
I see Becka and Claire having a conversation in the restaurant. The conversation is about lovers. Becka says she likes Claire, but Claire is more reserved.
cosmic sounds
B. G+ f+g+ B.
D+ e. D+ g+
FD+e. D+ g+
I'm with Tom.
We have been out to a party, and are walking home, along the silent street. The dawn is just showing on the horizon.
We quietly enter his house, hoping to not disturb any one's sleep, but his mum is still up, waiting for toms younger bro who still out.
Toms younger brother now gets back, and, on witnessing the angry and worried look on his mums face, holds up door mat to his mum.
On the underside of the doormat it says Welcome, don't worry about under culture.
---
I'm with a group of coop friends.
We are travelling along a very barren dusty road, like moon surface, on our bikes.
We are heading towards this very high point; a mountain plateau, for a special alignment with higher forces. Ben, the cycle leader, looks around. We have cycled too far, past the plateau we are aiming for, and so we head back, but Ben goes on beyond to see this other spot, as he has business there. As we head back to the plateau, Ben catches us up very quickly. We sit on plateau, and witness a very beautiful sky. The stars open out, crystal clear in the black, and its as if we are sitting on the moon.
----
I'm at a music concert.
Me and all my mates are on the stage, and we all have rattles and drums, and so does the audience; this concert involves a lot of audience participation.
Chiv, who is leading the jam, is yelling out instructions like stop! And start! A bit like when you are in a samba band, but this time much bigger; at least a thousand people from the audience are joining in. He and a few others are sat behind massive drum kits, which they are playing with the most funky drumming you ever heard.
Chiv stands up to conduct the ending of the piece, and then there is quiet.
Now Aidan's friend has a special song to perform.
I stand next to Luke and we listen and play quietly along to the first song he sings. its a bit like a David Bowie song. After this song the whole place goes very quiet, and the second song starts up. An old lady with a beautiful voice and stirring presence comes onto the stage to teach the audience the backing vocal to the song. The backing vocal fits in perfectly with the rest of the song; a hauntingly beautiful melody over a drone wash of rainbow ethereal sounds.
D+ e. D+ g+
FD+e. D+ g+
I'm with Tom.
We have been out to a party, and are walking home, along the silent street. The dawn is just showing on the horizon.
We quietly enter his house, hoping to not disturb any one's sleep, but his mum is still up, waiting for toms younger bro who still out.
Toms younger brother now gets back, and, on witnessing the angry and worried look on his mums face, holds up door mat to his mum.
On the underside of the doormat it says Welcome, don't worry about under culture.
---
I'm with a group of coop friends.
We are travelling along a very barren dusty road, like moon surface, on our bikes.
We are heading towards this very high point; a mountain plateau, for a special alignment with higher forces. Ben, the cycle leader, looks around. We have cycled too far, past the plateau we are aiming for, and so we head back, but Ben goes on beyond to see this other spot, as he has business there. As we head back to the plateau, Ben catches us up very quickly. We sit on plateau, and witness a very beautiful sky. The stars open out, crystal clear in the black, and its as if we are sitting on the moon.
----
I'm at a music concert.
Me and all my mates are on the stage, and we all have rattles and drums, and so does the audience; this concert involves a lot of audience participation.
Chiv, who is leading the jam, is yelling out instructions like stop! And start! A bit like when you are in a samba band, but this time much bigger; at least a thousand people from the audience are joining in. He and a few others are sat behind massive drum kits, which they are playing with the most funky drumming you ever heard.
Chiv stands up to conduct the ending of the piece, and then there is quiet.
Now Aidan's friend has a special song to perform.
I stand next to Luke and we listen and play quietly along to the first song he sings. its a bit like a David Bowie song. After this song the whole place goes very quiet, and the second song starts up. An old lady with a beautiful voice and stirring presence comes onto the stage to teach the audience the backing vocal to the song. The backing vocal fits in perfectly with the rest of the song; a hauntingly beautiful melody over a drone wash of rainbow ethereal sounds.
bee dream
I'm with Charly, my beekeeper friend from Coed.
I have a dream that I'm about to swarm with a swarm of bees, and all of a sudden we are off, flying up through the air.
Its so exciting and exhilarating.
I wake, and Simon, the bee man is there. I tell him my dream and he tells me that this is a good dream, a very good sign. I get the feeling that this dream was a premonition, so I go wandering to find swarms. I wander over to the hives to see how they are getting on, and yes, the first one has swarmed, and the swarm is strangely hanging around the old hive. When I get close, I see that the bees are full of honey, they are like little fluffy golden balls. - its all the store they need to take with them for the building of the new hive.
I get one of these honey coated bees on my hand and it gets really angry and stings me, and now I've aggravated the whole swarm, so I make a move out of the way to another area. Here there are more swarms, which are hovering around the branches of trees,
These swarms are also hostile and so I make sure to keep well out of there way.
One bee ends up following me everywhere, and I end up killing it to stop it bothering me. But now I feel that I've aggravated the whole swarm, and I get worried and go to shelter in these buildings, not far from the swarm.
Charly is still outside, so i go back outside to chat to her. I tell her about the bee swarms. i can see that there are 4 swarms all hanging out close to one another, not far from where I'm stood. They are spiraling around the branches, so I don't go too close.
I go back into the building to keep safe from the swarms. 2 young women are staying in one of the rooms, and I see them and find them very attractive. They see me but we don't exchange any words.
I go back outside and I end up getting chased by some bees a second time and out of fear and frustration I stand on one of the bees to kill it. I go back to shelter in the buildings, and sit down in the room with the 2 young women. A bee comes to me- not another!! I think. But this one is not trying to harm me, and it comes to rest on my hand. I see how beautiful the bee is, and say sorry to the bee for killing two of its kind. It feels good to talk to the bee.
I have a dream that I'm about to swarm with a swarm of bees, and all of a sudden we are off, flying up through the air.
Its so exciting and exhilarating.
I wake, and Simon, the bee man is there. I tell him my dream and he tells me that this is a good dream, a very good sign. I get the feeling that this dream was a premonition, so I go wandering to find swarms. I wander over to the hives to see how they are getting on, and yes, the first one has swarmed, and the swarm is strangely hanging around the old hive. When I get close, I see that the bees are full of honey, they are like little fluffy golden balls. - its all the store they need to take with them for the building of the new hive.
I get one of these honey coated bees on my hand and it gets really angry and stings me, and now I've aggravated the whole swarm, so I make a move out of the way to another area. Here there are more swarms, which are hovering around the branches of trees,
These swarms are also hostile and so I make sure to keep well out of there way.
One bee ends up following me everywhere, and I end up killing it to stop it bothering me. But now I feel that I've aggravated the whole swarm, and I get worried and go to shelter in these buildings, not far from the swarm.
Charly is still outside, so i go back outside to chat to her. I tell her about the bee swarms. i can see that there are 4 swarms all hanging out close to one another, not far from where I'm stood. They are spiraling around the branches, so I don't go too close.
I go back into the building to keep safe from the swarms. 2 young women are staying in one of the rooms, and I see them and find them very attractive. They see me but we don't exchange any words.
I go back outside and I end up getting chased by some bees a second time and out of fear and frustration I stand on one of the bees to kill it. I go back to shelter in the buildings, and sit down in the room with the 2 young women. A bee comes to me- not another!! I think. But this one is not trying to harm me, and it comes to rest on my hand. I see how beautiful the bee is, and say sorry to the bee for killing two of its kind. It feels good to talk to the bee.
kristina
I have just finished teaching my course at braziers. I am round at Kristina's and I'm telling her about braziers.
"Bees", She says, "oh yeah I know about the bees I saw them last year"
Oh! I didn't know she had been...
"Have you seen the Top Bar Hive its new!" i say.
She hasn't.
Then a Bee comes buzzing around my head, which for some reason feels quite normal despite its annoying-ness.
"I have been feeling this Bees presence all evening" I say,
"This one seems to be checking me out or something.."
Kristina is only a little impressed as I tell her all things I've been teaching on the course.
"Its great" she says, "but imagine how good you would be if you just focused on one thing? Concentrated your efforts more single-mindedly....
I know what she means, and its true, I do feel like I have been spreading myself a bit too thin...
I write out this poetic and cryptic message on my phone for Kristina, since prophecy is best hidden in poetry and symbol; I am predicting what I'm going to do in the future. It has lots of hidden meanings in it, and when I read it to her, she struggles to understand what the hidden messages are. I hardly know myself! While I'm reading it this bee keeps buzzing around my head. We both agree at the end however on one thing; that we were going to move into a house together, and with other housing coop members.
"Bees", She says, "oh yeah I know about the bees I saw them last year"
Oh! I didn't know she had been...
"Have you seen the Top Bar Hive its new!" i say.
She hasn't.
Then a Bee comes buzzing around my head, which for some reason feels quite normal despite its annoying-ness.
"I have been feeling this Bees presence all evening" I say,
"This one seems to be checking me out or something.."
Kristina is only a little impressed as I tell her all things I've been teaching on the course.
"Its great" she says, "but imagine how good you would be if you just focused on one thing? Concentrated your efforts more single-mindedly....
I know what she means, and its true, I do feel like I have been spreading myself a bit too thin...
I write out this poetic and cryptic message on my phone for Kristina, since prophecy is best hidden in poetry and symbol; I am predicting what I'm going to do in the future. It has lots of hidden meanings in it, and when I read it to her, she struggles to understand what the hidden messages are. I hardly know myself! While I'm reading it this bee keeps buzzing around my head. We both agree at the end however on one thing; that we were going to move into a house together, and with other housing coop members.
Friday, 2 July 2010
in search of the real
Short poem
The words of the songs don't help.
And tear stained pillows don't come to life
I don't know what's real any more
I don't know if I'm even real
But even though the pillow won't come to life, I will surrender my head to it all the same,
How would I know if even all that I ever thought were true turned out to be false?
Watching the swaying of the grass in the breeze, by the my mind quietens.
And now there's no more monsters in the cracks in the pavement
And I'm no longer wrong for stepping out of line
e a g d b e d a g b a e d
a g b a
The words of the songs don't help.
And tear stained pillows don't come to life
I don't know what's real any more
I don't know if I'm even real
But even though the pillow won't come to life, I will surrender my head to it all the same,
How would I know if even all that I ever thought were true turned out to be false?
Watching the swaying of the grass in the breeze, by the my mind quietens.
And now there's no more monsters in the cracks in the pavement
And I'm no longer wrong for stepping out of line
e a g d b e d a g b a e d
a g b a
the magic place and the good and evil spirits
I'm with my brother James. We are outside Notredame school, at the front on the road, walking by the wall on the opposite side to the school. We are walking home. I want to show James this magic place just round the corner, it won't take long I tell him. I leave my bike unlocked resting against the wall without thinking...
After a minute or two I panic about the security of my bike; anyone could just jump on it and cycle off. James says its not to worry - he right, we are still only round corner. I'd hear if anyone jumped on my bike.
We are now at the magic spot. Its just a glade surounded by dark shady plants. We start singing this song, like an incantation to evoke some spirit, and the song brings us visions....
Its like watching a movie. The in the first movie, Carl Sagan is the lead character. He is this school boy who is also a mole. The crux of the movie rests on this point where he shows people what the universe is like by being fearless of death. He is singing a song at the top of this tower and he steps off the tower into mid air while still singing this song and he slowly starts descending to the ground, building speed as he drops. A bit like the cartoons where a car has driven off a cliff and the car hovers for a while before dropping. All the while he keeps singing, fearless of the death that awaits him at the bottom.
The second vision we have (I've seen them both before) is like a kiddies nightmare. Its all about trying to make people fear god. There's this nice little mouse who is asleep at the top of a church and in his sleep (though you think its real - I identify with all the little mouse's feelings, to the point where I think I am the mouse) these demons, which appear in the form of black crows, and scary black badgers with big fangs and rolling terrifying eyes, come to haunt him in his sleep. They are the evil spirits from the underworld and they have come to take away his soul, by making him fear. The crows in particular really try their best to evoke fear into the little mouse: they are flapping around in front of the screen trying to hypnotize the viewer with there black beady eyes. The little mouse wakes up. Few! "thank god! It was all a dream!" He thinks.
Then lightening strikes and the evil spirits come down out of the sky and from over the roof of the church to suck his blood! This is no dream, its real! ( But because I've seen this movie before, I don't find it as scary, but my brother james finds it scary, and he's nearly an adult now!
God knows how little kids respond to this film!
After a minute or two I panic about the security of my bike; anyone could just jump on it and cycle off. James says its not to worry - he right, we are still only round corner. I'd hear if anyone jumped on my bike.
We are now at the magic spot. Its just a glade surounded by dark shady plants. We start singing this song, like an incantation to evoke some spirit, and the song brings us visions....
Its like watching a movie. The in the first movie, Carl Sagan is the lead character. He is this school boy who is also a mole. The crux of the movie rests on this point where he shows people what the universe is like by being fearless of death. He is singing a song at the top of this tower and he steps off the tower into mid air while still singing this song and he slowly starts descending to the ground, building speed as he drops. A bit like the cartoons where a car has driven off a cliff and the car hovers for a while before dropping. All the while he keeps singing, fearless of the death that awaits him at the bottom.
The second vision we have (I've seen them both before) is like a kiddies nightmare. Its all about trying to make people fear god. There's this nice little mouse who is asleep at the top of a church and in his sleep (though you think its real - I identify with all the little mouse's feelings, to the point where I think I am the mouse) these demons, which appear in the form of black crows, and scary black badgers with big fangs and rolling terrifying eyes, come to haunt him in his sleep. They are the evil spirits from the underworld and they have come to take away his soul, by making him fear. The crows in particular really try their best to evoke fear into the little mouse: they are flapping around in front of the screen trying to hypnotize the viewer with there black beady eyes. The little mouse wakes up. Few! "thank god! It was all a dream!" He thinks.
Then lightening strikes and the evil spirits come down out of the sky and from over the roof of the church to suck his blood! This is no dream, its real! ( But because I've seen this movie before, I don't find it as scary, but my brother james finds it scary, and he's nearly an adult now!
God knows how little kids respond to this film!
new houses, new changes.
I've been given a plowing job - soil loosening.(Describe detail) I'm in the tractor, its really fast and fun, there are people who are still clearing up from the festival, and they are getting in the way from me finishing the job. I have to work around them - the ground is no longer grassy - but there are large patches of sand and chasms and dips in the land that I have to avoid,
I'm now driving round town with anne marie to go and visit our potential new house. We have a house that we may move into.. It has been rented out to people - its a council house; a newly built terrace. We are planning on moving in, but when we see it we are a bit doubtful about it. We drive around town a bit more... We are at the same time doing something very rebellious; sticking up these posters everywhere which inform people about all the stuff the government won't tell you. Once we have put up all the posters, we drive back to the house. Some young people have moved in. They are unpacking their things. We are surprised at this, and question why they are moving in- don't they know its our house now?
One of them comes over and explains.- they have been chucked out of their house, and the council let them into this one because there was nowhere for them to go and no-one was using this house... I get arguing with them, but then realise that I am, and shut my mouth. I let Anne Marie talk, because I know that she is better at talking. She doesn't want to talk however... She has something else in mind..
They have got the decks out and are putting on a party. Anne Marie wants to start dancing... I read this as a sign to let the house go, and so I accept the situation, and begin dancing.
---
I'm in Wellow. We are going on a trip, and everyone is waiting for me. I've just got too much to do before I leave, there are so many things that need doing.... Will I ever get them all done?
I'm now driving round town with anne marie to go and visit our potential new house. We have a house that we may move into.. It has been rented out to people - its a council house; a newly built terrace. We are planning on moving in, but when we see it we are a bit doubtful about it. We drive around town a bit more... We are at the same time doing something very rebellious; sticking up these posters everywhere which inform people about all the stuff the government won't tell you. Once we have put up all the posters, we drive back to the house. Some young people have moved in. They are unpacking their things. We are surprised at this, and question why they are moving in- don't they know its our house now?
One of them comes over and explains.- they have been chucked out of their house, and the council let them into this one because there was nowhere for them to go and no-one was using this house... I get arguing with them, but then realise that I am, and shut my mouth. I let Anne Marie talk, because I know that she is better at talking. She doesn't want to talk however... She has something else in mind..
They have got the decks out and are putting on a party. Anne Marie wants to start dancing... I read this as a sign to let the house go, and so I accept the situation, and begin dancing.
---
I'm in Wellow. We are going on a trip, and everyone is waiting for me. I've just got too much to do before I leave, there are so many things that need doing.... Will I ever get them all done?
the helpful train attendant
I am at the train station, and I am with one of the train attendants; a lady, and we are chatting about plants. She is showing me this new plant that she has been growing in a pot near the train station. I am very impressed by the plant. It looks very magical. A bit like an ornamental euphorbia, but much bigger, like a bush.
I ask her where I could get one, aware that my train is going to be leaving soon.
She tells me about a plant nursury down the road, but also that I can get a cutting off the plant she has to save time. My train has allready arrived at the station.
In a frantic bustle, I try to take a cutting, and run for my train. I get on, but then realise I've left my shoes somewhere, and I ask my friend, the train attendant if she's seen them. She has, thank god, and she gives them to me, just before the doors shut.
Few!
I ask her where I could get one, aware that my train is going to be leaving soon.
She tells me about a plant nursury down the road, but also that I can get a cutting off the plant she has to save time. My train has allready arrived at the station.
In a frantic bustle, I try to take a cutting, and run for my train. I get on, but then realise I've left my shoes somewhere, and I ask my friend, the train attendant if she's seen them. She has, thank god, and she gives them to me, just before the doors shut.
Few!
abundance love
Rosa tells me she has put up more dreams on her dream blog through a text.
I am at Thomas's course... Thomas tells us about a pond sit which is a good place for meditation. I decided that its a good place for me to sit, and so I wade through the shallow water to a mound sticking up out of the lake, and sit on the mound. Its spongy and wet, and I don't know if I do really want to sit on it. I sit anyway, and the view opens out before me.
I can now see down into an open quarry like area, in which workshops are being given. I walk down there and I meet a black chap who is fascinated by the abundance project. He is so delighted to meet me. He wants very specific instructions of what we do. I have my notes on me, which upon reading out, confuse him, and so I refer back to the hand book which is a much better tool to work from. I realise how valuable the handbook is now, and am glad that we are going to make some more hard copies.
When I realise who this black chap is, I am so honoured to be praised by this guy; he's a famous africa tribes leader, of the equivalent status of Nelson Mandella. He looked a bit like Herbie Hankoc and Roots Manuva.
He encourages me to make a performance out of the abundance project; to perform the harvesting and distribution of abundance.
I struggle with the words to say for the performance, and he puts words in my mouth.
Again I have to refer back to the hand book for guidance.
---
We have planned our performance, and are putting up a poster about the abundance performance. I climb up one of my favourite trees just next to hunters bar roundabout. Its the one in which I keep a plant in at the top, and because the weather has been so dry, the plant desperately needs watering. I climb up all the way to the top, but I forget to take up the water, and have to climb all the way down to get the water.
My new botanist friend is at the bottom and he says he would like to try climbing up to water the plant. I warn him about the safety of the tree; its very flimsy, even more so since I've not watered the plant at the top. He climbs up and manages to get to the top to water. I'm watching my friend in the tree swaying in the wind, concerned for him, but also vividly aware that this makes great publicity for abundance; it attracts so much attention; all the people in the cars are looking up at my friend swaying in the wind.
I'm stood on the ground, and am getting publicity material together for abundance. We are going to fill this tree with posters and apples and things abundance...
The authorities come along, due to all the attention we have given ourselves, and we know we are in trouble. Well actually its my fault. I removed a bit of a boring official notice, saying nothing in particular, to put up an abundance one. A lady with a clipboard comes along, and sees the damage, and has to get out a new notice.
'Can't you just mend the old one' I ask?
she shakes her head sternly and doesn't utter a word. 'Steve' says daniele, 'you just don't get it, it means a great deal to them'.
while they are replacing there little yellow plastic information on the wall, we all know we are going to get into trouble.
-----
I see a guy and his very fat girlfriend together. She asks him to pull out the pot of food from her vagina for her. She could probably reach it herself, despite her size, but she wants him to do it. Even though he's clearly done this many times before, he is reluctant since he knows people are watching. He goes ahead anyway, so as to express his love for her. He leans into her and puts his hand under her dress and reaches up. She has to give him directions.
"Further up, further up" she says, " that's it! Got it!"
He brings his hand back out with a round tupperware box in his hand. His hand and the box are covered in vaginal juices. I am amazed! How the hell did she manage to fit a box that big up her vagina?
-----
I'm walking with a group of young girls. they are looking very attractive, bright eyes shining, seeking love in there lives. One of them has been attracted to me for a very long time, and her friends have been nudging her to tell me. We stop at the top of the steps, which lead into Endcliffe park, and the small one with black hair, looks up at me and sings me a song.
Its to a Take That pop tune melody, but the words are sweeter, her own doing.
It went something like
I want to be your lover
We can be the best of friends
Forever
I will be by your side
When the dawn comes and the dew breaks,
I will still be by your side.
----
I listen, and am touched by her song.
Some older lads, come along; troublesome teenagers.
The oldest lad says in a threatening voice "I know what your up to".
He thinks I'm trying to seduce all these young girls. I have to admit to myself that I am naturally attracted to them, especially the one who sang me a song, since she is so sweet, and is really in love with me, but I know I'm too old. Much to old. And so I tell this sweet girl with the black hair that I'm too old for her, and that she is too young. She knew that would be the answer, but is sad all the same. I am also sad, since she now looks so miserable, and it makes me feel so bad...
I am at Thomas's course... Thomas tells us about a pond sit which is a good place for meditation. I decided that its a good place for me to sit, and so I wade through the shallow water to a mound sticking up out of the lake, and sit on the mound. Its spongy and wet, and I don't know if I do really want to sit on it. I sit anyway, and the view opens out before me.
I can now see down into an open quarry like area, in which workshops are being given. I walk down there and I meet a black chap who is fascinated by the abundance project. He is so delighted to meet me. He wants very specific instructions of what we do. I have my notes on me, which upon reading out, confuse him, and so I refer back to the hand book which is a much better tool to work from. I realise how valuable the handbook is now, and am glad that we are going to make some more hard copies.
When I realise who this black chap is, I am so honoured to be praised by this guy; he's a famous africa tribes leader, of the equivalent status of Nelson Mandella. He looked a bit like Herbie Hankoc and Roots Manuva.
He encourages me to make a performance out of the abundance project; to perform the harvesting and distribution of abundance.
I struggle with the words to say for the performance, and he puts words in my mouth.
Again I have to refer back to the hand book for guidance.
---
We have planned our performance, and are putting up a poster about the abundance performance. I climb up one of my favourite trees just next to hunters bar roundabout. Its the one in which I keep a plant in at the top, and because the weather has been so dry, the plant desperately needs watering. I climb up all the way to the top, but I forget to take up the water, and have to climb all the way down to get the water.
My new botanist friend is at the bottom and he says he would like to try climbing up to water the plant. I warn him about the safety of the tree; its very flimsy, even more so since I've not watered the plant at the top. He climbs up and manages to get to the top to water. I'm watching my friend in the tree swaying in the wind, concerned for him, but also vividly aware that this makes great publicity for abundance; it attracts so much attention; all the people in the cars are looking up at my friend swaying in the wind.
I'm stood on the ground, and am getting publicity material together for abundance. We are going to fill this tree with posters and apples and things abundance...
The authorities come along, due to all the attention we have given ourselves, and we know we are in trouble. Well actually its my fault. I removed a bit of a boring official notice, saying nothing in particular, to put up an abundance one. A lady with a clipboard comes along, and sees the damage, and has to get out a new notice.
'Can't you just mend the old one' I ask?
she shakes her head sternly and doesn't utter a word. 'Steve' says daniele, 'you just don't get it, it means a great deal to them'.
while they are replacing there little yellow plastic information on the wall, we all know we are going to get into trouble.
-----
I see a guy and his very fat girlfriend together. She asks him to pull out the pot of food from her vagina for her. She could probably reach it herself, despite her size, but she wants him to do it. Even though he's clearly done this many times before, he is reluctant since he knows people are watching. He goes ahead anyway, so as to express his love for her. He leans into her and puts his hand under her dress and reaches up. She has to give him directions.
"Further up, further up" she says, " that's it! Got it!"
He brings his hand back out with a round tupperware box in his hand. His hand and the box are covered in vaginal juices. I am amazed! How the hell did she manage to fit a box that big up her vagina?
-----
I'm walking with a group of young girls. they are looking very attractive, bright eyes shining, seeking love in there lives. One of them has been attracted to me for a very long time, and her friends have been nudging her to tell me. We stop at the top of the steps, which lead into Endcliffe park, and the small one with black hair, looks up at me and sings me a song.
Its to a Take That pop tune melody, but the words are sweeter, her own doing.
It went something like
I want to be your lover
We can be the best of friends
Forever
I will be by your side
When the dawn comes and the dew breaks,
I will still be by your side.
----
I listen, and am touched by her song.
Some older lads, come along; troublesome teenagers.
The oldest lad says in a threatening voice "I know what your up to".
He thinks I'm trying to seduce all these young girls. I have to admit to myself that I am naturally attracted to them, especially the one who sang me a song, since she is so sweet, and is really in love with me, but I know I'm too old. Much to old. And so I tell this sweet girl with the black hair that I'm too old for her, and that she is too young. She knew that would be the answer, but is sad all the same. I am also sad, since she now looks so miserable, and it makes me feel so bad...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
